Ready for baby!

21 Nov

Well, we’re inching towards an inducement date, mostly due to the fact that baby mama has been on Enoxoparin (that’s medical speak for fucking uncomfortable shot of anti-blood coagulant in the belly every damn night for the duration of the pregnancy, thank you very much. Blood coagulant is medical speak for blood sticks together too fast and kills you dead like doornail).

And I can tell you, we’re totally ready. For instance, here’s a photo just taken of the baby’s nursery:

Note the playful colors of the paper shredder and the contrasting textures of the totally-filled-with-the-detritus-of-our-lives bookshelf (it’s like mid-century modern, but without any of the lines, neatness, style, or cultural cachet). I mean, it’s so craptacular that we don’t even want to currently use our office as an office. But there’s a diaper champ!

So yeah, that’s not so much ‘done’ as ‘not even close to done, and no plan to actually make this a space we would be comfortable putting a baby without child services coming to take us away’. Or maybe to put us into contention for Clean House, or Hoarders. Whatever. Babies are small, right? Plus, the Mongolian Babies baby seemed pretty frickin’ happy, and he was living in a yurt.

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5 Responses to “Ready for baby!”

  1. Ivy November 22, 2010 at 8:22 pm #

    You got the Champ, you’re good to go! Just put a changing pad on top of the desk and you’re set – the laptop will be a good distraction for baby.

  2. Peter November 22, 2010 at 8:51 pm #

    Two different people last week told me that I could use a dresser drawer as a crib. And isn’t a changing pad really over-rated anyhow?

  3. Ivy November 22, 2010 at 10:51 pm #

    Actually, we’d been hoping to put V in a dresser drawer way back when, but we were worried that in a bout of sleep deprivation one of us would inadvertently slam the drawer shut.

    Then we found out that you’re supposed to take the drawer *out* of the dresser and set it on top of something. What’s the fun in that?

  4. Ivy November 22, 2010 at 11:17 pm #

    Oh, and I think you mean that the changing pad *cover* is over-rated (they come in all sorts of designs, colors, textures (flannel, terrycloth), etc.). I’m actually a big fan of the actual changing pad (approx $11.99 at Target) which due to its concave form and buckling belt ensure that baby dearest doesn’t roll off of the surface you’re changing him/her on. Even me – anti-stuff person that I am – goes for that.

    Unless you’re being facetious, of course. I’m a little too tired to get humor right now. ;-(

  5. Peter November 23, 2010 at 8:45 am #

    I was being facetious. My humor is apparently very hit or miss. I asked the guy who installed our crib (yay!) yesterday if he had instructions for how to put it together. He said, it’s really just common sense. Then I deadpan asked if he had instructions for how to raise the baby. He looked at me like I was a moron for like 10 seconds without speaking, then said, What are you talking about?

    This is why I don’t usually talk to people.

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